I understand what it’s like seeking God and being a mother at the same time. How many times did I kneel at an altar and try to keep my mind on God while one of my own was sprawled out beside me, sometimes wallowing on me? And yet, you can’t stop seeking.
I remember holding a preschooler who was bucking and bucking, until by the end of church, I seriously felt like the quarter horse at Walmart! The thought crossed my mind, “Why did I come? I didn’t get anything out of this service!” And yet, you can’t stop coming!
To testify, pray, concentrate, or seek took a lot of effort at times. But I couldn’t afford to go downhill. There were times that I was sleep deprived, and God seemed so far away. Emotionally and spiritually I felt dry.
I found that if I would stay steady (even if my children were distracting my mind) and draw nigh to God (whether or not I felt dry), that there would come a day when HE WOULD draw nigh to me!
It was during one of those times when I had come near to God and was finding His presence real. As I worked around the house, I lifted my heart to God. I was crying and singing, “My heart says, ‘Yes!’”
Samuel was about two at the time, and my attention was not really on him until he blurted out, “Well, my heart says NO!”
I’m so glad that I’ve watched Samuel’s heart change in the last sixteen years to say, “Yes” also!
Today, I still have obstacles. It’s not the obstacles that I faced as a mother with young children, but trust me, there are always things to overcome. And my heart still says, “Yes.”
Whatever your obstacle is, you have to get around it! When my pastor went through multiple eye surgeries and kidney cancer, he came out more victoriously than he went in. He told us that he prayed until he got on top of it. He knew that he could either be buried or climb on top. You can’t afford to be buried.
Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded.